The Dark Side of Love Bombing: Understanding Narcissistic Manipulation

What is love bombing?

An intense and overwhelming display of affection.

How do narcissists use love bombing to manipulate their partners?

Love bombing is a term used to describe an intense and overwhelming display of affection and attention from a romantic partner. While it may seem like a dream come true, it can actually be a tactic used by narcissists to manipulate and control their partners. Learn more about the dark side of love bombing and how to recognize it.

Narcissists use love bombing as a way to quickly gain control and power over their partners. They shower their partners with attention, compliments, and gifts, making them feel special and loved. This creates a sense of dependency and attachment, making it harder for the partner to leave the relationship. Once the narcissist has gained control, they may begin to manipulate and abuse their partner, using the threat of withdrawal of affection to maintain control. It's important to recognize the signs of love bombing and to seek help if you suspect you are in a manipulative relationship.

Love bombing serves the purpose of seducing a new partner and thereby gaining control over them. Once this goal has been achieved, the love bombing tends to fade and abusive behaviors start to emerge. It’s difficult to provide a specific time span as it can last from a few weeks to several months or even a year. A survey conducted on 500 individuals who had been in a relationship with a narcissist estimated the duration of love bombing. For men, the duration was around five and a half months while for women it was three and a half months.

Love bombing is the narcissist’s first step in gaining control over you. Once you are committed to them, they tend to become demanding, cruel, argumentative, and aggressive. In other words, after love bombing comes abuse. The “abuse” phase refers to the narcissist skillfully destroying their victim’s self-esteem and sense of self to increase the power they have over them. This makes the victim feel as though they have no other option but to stay with the narcissist.

Furthermore, the narcissist manipulates the victim into believing the abuse is their fault. Some of these behaviors include gaslighting, warm-cold behavior, and withholding love and affection. The victim tries to please the narcissist as a way to get back to how things were before, unaware that it was a façade.

You may recognize yourself and your relationship (past or present) in this description of the unhealthy love bombing relationship. My meditations are designed to increase your self-esteem, build confidence and empowerment and enable you to move on from an abusive relationship. Last but definitely not least — the “secret” techniques will make your love bombing narcissist wish he’d never met you because he will be unable to move forward in life and get you off his mind. Karma! ;-)